Disclaimer: This post is rated "P" for Potty-talk. It may contain some material offensive to cottonheaded ninnymuggins. If you don't want to hear it, walk away....or type "google" or "anthropologie" into your browser thingy.
Okay, so the 1st floor bathroom where I work is the most disturbingly quiet room you have ever encountered in your life. Bathroom should have SOMETHING, okay. Background music, a fan quietly turning, a vent at least, right? Alas, no. Our 3-stall bathroom is horrifyingly silent. When its my time to shine, I pray that no one is in there. Because you can't relax, you know? And if you can't relax, you can't releeeaaaase. And its not like you can just flush and let THAT noise fill up the room b/c the flush is one of those stupid, supersonic flushes that only last 2.4 seconds. Boo.
Bathroom issue #2:
The floors are so shiny that you can see the person next to you's reflection.. and I mean, really well. Like, if you were next to me and I accidentally looked down on the ground, I could say what color pantaloones (spelling?) you were wearing. So, you spend your time trying to relax, focusing super hard on not looking at the floor, and also keeping your reflection as modest as possible. This is not conducive to the aforementioned "release".
Needless to say, the bathrooms are difficult to go #1 in, let alone drop the kids off. Incidentally, I walk upstairs to the 2nd floor bathroom at least three times a day so I don't have to camp out on the toilet and wait for the stalls to empty along with the stinking girl taking her sweet time at the sink. And then, you're all paranoid, like "wait, is someone coming in?" Muscles contract! And so, in summary, thank you, higher ups, for the exercise.